wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize