I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
