No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
