i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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