Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
