I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
