I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
