You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
