its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
