: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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