Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
