I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
