i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
