We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
