a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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