I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
