Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize