Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
