so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
