you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize