Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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