There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
