just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
