shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
