Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize