yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize