If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I fill condoms, not promises.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
