Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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