Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize
