We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
