Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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