So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
