dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
