Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
