Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Randomize
