In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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