He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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