Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I have aggressive nipples.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
