He kissed a someone with a penis
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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