After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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