a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I know her cup size but not her name....
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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