lets start a swedish sibling band together
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
