She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm šš»š
We are so blessed
Everything isnāt always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes thereās tequila.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
