Christians are straight up FREAKS
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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