ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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