just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
