I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
