This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
