First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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