I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
