So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
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