We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
is this the sara with the beer cane?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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